Shrimp tacos with mango salsa.

I know that complaining about the eight thousand million billion tons of snow makes for pretty dull reading material, but seriously, I’m over it. Everyone who’s wearing their pajamas inside out and dropping ice cubes into the toilet and performing intricate snow dances, or whatever it is you weird winter people do, PLEASESTOP.

But, let’s be honest, it’s winter and it’s going to be miserable for at least another month. Instead of letting The Surly take over your life for the foreseeable future, might I suggest cranking up your heat, cracking open a beer and eating some food that feels like summer?

The one with all the clams.

Originally posted March 2012.

So, I have a funny story for you guys. And not funny like, “ha ha, Lauren, you’re such a comedian.” More like, “ha ha, that would happen to you!”

I decided I wanted to make some steamed clams for dinner tonight. Because, y’know, they’re delicious and good warm-weather food. So I bought two dozen clams from ShopRite on my way home, because ShopRite has never done me wrong with fish. Or anything, really, but this story is specifically about mollusks.

So I get home, clean them off, and throw a bunch of ‘em in the pot with the wine and the butter and all that good stuff, and wait 10 minutes and….!

Nothing. Well, one cracked open a teensy bit. The rest were…well, clammed up.

I think, okay. I throw another six or so in the pot, wait a bit, and…!

Nope. These guys aren’t opening up, either. So I think, awesome, I just bought two dozen bad clams. HOORAY. So whatever, no matter. There’s a seafood place down the block from my apartment! So I traipse down there, buy two dozen littlenecks. I get home, open the lid of the pot…