Once upon a time, probably in 2009 or something, I bought a box of pound cake mix. I probably had plans for it, an idea that slipped away and has long since been forgotten. It sat in the pantry in not one, but two kitchens, as different boxes and bottles of ingredients around it were routinely used, finished off and replaced. Last night, it was finally pulled off of its shelf.
In all honesty, it almost ended up in the garbage, because … guys, I’m a little embarrassed about this … its “best by” date was almost three years ago.
I looked at the contents, and nothing was turning colors it wasn’t supposed to, and it did not appear to be sentient, but I wanted to be sure. I googled “Will I get sick/die from eating expired cake mix?” But… I don’t exactly trust random commenters on Yahoo Answers, whose answers ranged from “Yeah, your probably fine I guess,” to “Don’t do it lol ull die.” So, y’know. No uniformity, questionable grammar… it was time to consult my mom. (Whose grammar, for the record, is impeccable.)
She said it (likely) wouldn’t make me ill, but that the leavening agents just might not work as well, and asked what I was doing with a box of five-year-old cake mix. I…didn’t really have an answer for that.
You’re probably like, “Why are you sharing a recipe that’s basically boxed cake mix + ingredients on box?” And to that, I say … I changed the recipe (kinda). By adding vanilla yogurt and vanilla extract. And adding a glaze – a chocolate glaze, that’s actually not so much a glaze as it is a delightful icing that I pretty much just dumped on the cake. I wanted it to look rustic and uneven and cool, but it just looks like a chocolate puddle. Whatever. It tastes delicious. So delicious, in fact, that I originally wanted to bring it in and share it with my co-workers, but then thought, nahhhh. I also might have eaten a slice of it for breakfast. I’m rationalizing that because instead of using half a stick of butter, I only used two tablespoons of butter, and two tablespoons of vanilla Greek yogurt. Which makes the cake healthier…ish. Right?
Vanilla pound cake with chocolate sauce-glaze
For the cake (adapted from the recipe on the box)
1 box pound cake mix
2/3 cup water
2 tbsp unsalted butter
2 tbsp vanilla Greek yogurt
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
For the glaze
3/4 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
3 tbsp unsalted butter
1 tbsp simple syrup or light corn syrup
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
For the cake: Preheat your oven to 350F. Lightly grease a 9-by-5 baking dish and sprinkle with flour. Combine all ingredients in a large bowl and beat with a hand mixer (or use a standing mixer) until fully combined and smooth. Pour the batter into your prepared baking dish, place in the oven and bake until golden, about 55 minutes.
For the glaze: Boil some water in a medium saucepan. Put your chocolate chips and butter in a mixing bowl, and place over the pot of boiling water. Mix until melted, then stir in your simple syrup and vanilla extract. Pour the sauce over the pound cake. Eat it for breakfast. Or dessert. Y’know, like an adult.